On October 1st 2016 at around 3:00 pm we said our vows having no idea what life had in store for us. The next few posts will be about the real life wedding vows, and some of our experiences with a few of the phrases. First up for better or worse. At the end of our wedding day we were on cloud 9 floating out of our reception high off of love and the perfection of our wedding day. It was everything that we had dreamed of and more. All of the saving and sacrificing made the day so worth it! Then we went from our fabulous wedding to our wonderful honeymoon in the Dominican Republic. We swam with the dolphins went to an amazing spa where we were pampered for half a day, and it was so wonderful! We even won a dance off at one of the shows at the hard rock resort! We came back from our honeymoon like if life is going to be like this together we got this! After our honeymoon we went our separate ways for 4 days Eddie flew back to D.C. and I drove to Michigan. On October 13th I went to Chica...

One thing that many people that are not married assume is that marriage is this fairy tale where you come home kiss each other, cuddle, have delicious meals, sex all the time, and this over abundance of money because of your newly combined finances. That is not true. Maybe the first week or so is like that then reality hits. Here are 5 unsexy conversations that we had to have this year. Each of these all though not fun are important to our marriage surviving and thriving. Death- I know this one sounds so terrible to think about because you are so in love and your significant other is not going anywhere anytime soon. The reality is it's a possibility. We don't know what each day holds and preparing for death is something that we started talking about before our marriage. Everyone should have life insurance policies! They don't cost that much and it protects your family if something were to happen to you. We have term life policies through Northwest Mutual for now. We also...

As we are on the cusp of being married for one full year. I must say that we learned a few things about what it takes to make this marriage thing work forever. I am thankful that during our time of dating that we were able to read a few books together about relationships. I am also thankful that during my time of being single that I did a lot of reading up on marriage because those books really helped when it came time to actually execute what we learned from those hours invested in  reading up on marriage. The lessons below are a summation of what we have collectively learned in love. Through it all our relationship has grown more than we expected. We have been tested throughout this year in every way possible and the amazing thing is that it is really only the beginning of our journey together! The Love Lessons are as follows in no particular order:   Shut Up and Pray- I don’t know how many times we have both had to do that this year. I know that I’m a trip and ‘I...

Have you landed your dream job, or were you accepted into your dream college program? Now that you have made it to that goal you are questioning if you should even be there. I know that that was my struggle stepping into each promotion and my Master’s program. I was young and insecure, and I didn’t think that I deserved it. Yes I had worked hard to get there, but for some reason I didn’t think that I deserved to be there. Often times I have found that the person that is the biggest saboteur is ourselves. We talk ourselves out of speaking up at work because we don’t think that our voice matters. Maybe you are a woman maybe you are a person of color and you think in the back of your mind that you are fulfilling some quota. This is not true! We need to stop the negative thinking. It’s that stinking thinking that holds us back from being all that we can be. We tell ourselves that we aren’t good enough and then we fulfill that prophecy because of how we think. The bible says in Proverbs 23...

In April of 2015 after about 18 months of living in the DMV area, I got the opportunity to interview for a promotion in Benton Harbor, Michigan. At the time I had been dating my then boyfriend and now husband for a year and 5 months. So I did what any logical young ambitious woman would do, and I followed my career. That month I interviewed for the job and got it! I was excited! I would be making more money and living in a cheaper location, so I would be able to set myself up better financially. Of course I was concerned about where this left my relationship, but one thing that I always said is that if it is meant to be it will work out, and if not at least I live in a new place. (I know I can be kind of harsh, and I am not even going to lie and say that I am working on it because I am not.) Anyway I had the conversation with my boyfriend Eddie and I said, so what do you think I should do. Do you know where our relationship is headed? He said, well you are right I am not your husband...

I grew up with a great example of what a home is supposed to be. Yes there is a difference between a house and a home. A house is the physical structure that people live in. A home is a place where people feel comfortable and memories are made. I was a military brat so we moved a lot growing up, but my mom always made sure that our rooms were put in place before we began school. I remember her spending countless hours throughout the years unpacking to make sure that our home was set up and properly decorated. She understood that our home environment was key to our success in the classroom and in life.  Throughout my childhood I remember our different homes being a place filled with game nights, sleepovers, and talks about life at the dinner table or on the couch. There have been many times that as young adults my sister Brandi and I have brought home people to spend the weekend in our home. Many of our friends to this day see our parents as their own. I like that our home was al...

My parents said that I couldn’t date until I turned 16. Shortly after my 16th birthday my dad and I went out on a "practice date." I remember it very clearly we went to the Cracker Barrel and my dad was going to teach me the things to look for while dating. So the date with dad begins. I get dressed up and he does too and we are off. He starts the night by opening my car door and the lessons begin. He said if the joker can’t open a car door for you then he ain’t the right one (Lesson 1). As we are driving to the Cracker Barrel my dad said always look at his gas tank some guys try to pull stuff. He should have at least a half tank of gas when you get in the car (Lesson 2). We get to the restaurant and my dad of course opens the door for me and we are seated for dinner. During this dinner my dad and I discuss boundaries and the rules that I would agree to follow as I started on this new milestone of dating. I realized discussing boundaries before the date ever b...

I have learned that you can’t really be good at it ALL at the same time. You can try and be stressed out and never feel that you are doing enough especially in the age of social media! On social media it appears that everyone else is living life perfectly without any struggles (although we all know that this is not true). We still choose to believe the image of perfection that everyone is posting. Understanding this was a HARD concept for me to embrace. I put so many unrealistic expectations on myself based on what I saw others posting. Perfection is what I strive for... I wanted to have the perfectly clean house. Amazing delicious healthy dinners prepared every night for my husband. Exercise 3-5 times per week. Never be frustrated. All while pursuing my dreams and just making things happen seamlessly and flawlessly. Then I went back to school and elements of my life fell apart… Before school I was heavily involved in pursuing my health and fitness goals by doing CrossFit. Onc...